At 26-years-old, I was everything any career-focused millennial should be – stressed. I had moved to Dallas to live the dream. I wanted to be a mix of Carrie and Samantha from SATC and soak up the perks of living a fast-paced lifestyle. I worked a full-time job in public relations, freelanced on the side (because a full-time job wasn’t enough) and committed myself to countless social obligations.

However, while the foundation of my life was sturdy, the more commitments I stacked on top of each other would inevitably come crashing down. Stress was the key culprit. In the last two years, I had to quit and leave the corporate world because of a chronic vestibular diagnosis that prevents me from a normal work lifestyle.

While I learned how to adapt to my new normal, a new storm was brewing. My father escaped the grips of death a few times before undergoing a triple bypass procedure, all during the time my mom was being treated for Breast Cancer, a diagnosis she received in March.

Did I mention I was stressed?

I could continue on about how many times I cried, mourned for my old life or asked God, “why me?” But that’s how you find yourself in a dark hole. People fall on hard times, no matter how rich or poor you are in terms of money or loved-ones. Life challenges do not discriminate, but how you play the hand that you’re given is what makes you a better person.

Step 1: Make Adjustments To Your Career

When I decided I need to leave the corporate world, I was devastated. I had worked so hard in my short-lived career life and I so badly wanted to be excel, but that comes at a price. I’ve talked about this before – I was guilty of not listening to my body when it screamed at me to take a break or to tell my boss to “take a hike.”

My body had to freak out enough to send me to the emergency room and eventually receive a diagnosis of Vestibular Migraines, Vestibular Neuritis and potential spinal fluid leaking from my ears for me to wake up – all exasperated by stress.

Like I said, I was devastated, but if I had a crystal ball like so many of us wish we had, I would see that it was the best decision I had ever made. Today, I am still working in the industry, but I’m doing it full-time on my watch. I have several projects and clients for which I write content and provide marketing strategy, but if I need to take a break because my dizziness is flaring up to the point I can’t look at my computer, I am able to.

No job is worth physically harming yourself. It might be scary to quit, but this was the first self-care step I took that has made me as “normal” as I can possibly be.

Step 2: Evaluate Friendships And Ditch The Duds

I’m not the first to declare that “you find out who your friends are” when you’re going through a crisis, but that statement holds an abundance of credence. Sure, it was easy to see who didn’t want to hang out anymore with a vestibular diagnosis – I was boring. Going out and partying ‘til sunrise was no longer an option, not to mention I was bedridden for the first few months of my diagnosis anyway.

Honestly, I’m happy that it happened because it showed me that the friends who stuck around, would be the ones who would continue to shine.

As I said, my parents were hit with back-to-back serious and scary health issues. People die from heart attacks and cancer daily and to find out that both your parents would undergo surgery within a few weeks was more than most can handle.

Here I was again dealing with stress causing my own issues to flare up, but my close friends were there to lean on. Not only did they financially donate to my parents’ medical bills, but they were there every day to console me.

I’ve always seemed to have a large group of friends, but this last year showed me you only need a few good ones. (Heck, I even had people with whom I had lost touch with that were there and still had my back.)

It’s okay to clean up your friend list outside of Facebook. Believe it or not, the company you keep can impact your life significantly – especially toxic friendships.

Step 3: Explore New Hobbies

Exploring new hobbies is essential to providing yourself self-care. By finding something new that you enjoy not only fulfills your self-worth but also your self-esteem. For instance, I discovered I had a new-found love for cooking after my vestibular diagnosis.

Our world is surrounded by screens (our cell phones, TVs, iPads, computers, etc.) and when you have light sensitivity like me, it just makes you feel like shit. I needed something else to break up my screen time from work to relaxing at home.

I initially ventured into cooking as a way to distract myself from the anxiety of my disorder. I needed to focus on something else rather than the room spinning. However, what started as a distraction turned into something I love to do. Frankly, I would rather cook than go out most days.

Another hobby I explored was working on a few written passion projects. By diving into something you are passionate about, it’s easy to let daily stressors melt away. I can easily escape into the words of what I’m writing and put my real problems on hold. It’s absolutely crucial for both your mind and body to have a break.

Step 4: Take A Break, Plan A Vacation

If I have to explain why this is helpful, you’re dying for a vacation.

But, really, get out of town!

Step 5: Focus On The Good – Make Life An Adventure

I’m basic. Shocking, I know. So, like most basic women I am guilty of getting caught up in unnecessary drama, gossip, and other trivial matters.

My husband and I recently traveled to New York for our anniversary and work in May and were stranded in Washington D.C. because of severe storms. Long story short, the only transportation offered to us was a four-hour bus ride to JFK getting us in at 2 a.m.

Sure, I didn’t love that we paid for a flight on Delta to get us to NYC and now I was expected to hop on a bus. I could have been angry, and it would be warranted. Instead, I decided to laugh it off and look at it as an adventure. I was lucky enough to see D.C., Baltimore, Philadelphia and the outskirts of New York which probably would have never happened otherwise.

Where I’m getting at is that you can choose to freak out over inconveniences or you can just roll with it. I’m still human so I work on this daily, but in the past year I’ve become more accepting and easy-going in regard to the hand I am dealt. By focusing on the positives, my stress-level has significantly decreased and has helped me live a happier life.

Self-care is something that shouldn’t be ignored. Whether you’re going through an overwhelming time of your life, or work is burying you, it’s important to take a step back and focus on your mental and physical health. Listen to your body. If it’s screaming that you need to take an hour to get a massage, or drastically change your life like me, do it.

Seriously, before it’s too late.

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